Saturday, March 28, 2009

Blog Therapy?

Have I told you how obsessive I can be? I like to have everything on the shelf with the label facing just looks neater that way and boy, it helps ya find stuff a lot faster. And yes, when purchasing a magazine I have to grab the one near the middle-back of the know, the one no one's already perused and bent up the pages. Well, today as I was working on a little project for my daughter's upcoming Easter celebration at school, I was going about it business as usual and it occurred to me that some of you may not realize how much thought and planning goes into filling 12 little plastic Easter eggs with candy. I wrote down some instructions, so here's what you do:

Step One: Carefully cut the end of each bag open in as straight a line as possible. Then spread the candy out before you so you can see the variety of colors and make sure there are no broken pieces or torn wrappers. Discard unacceptable pieces. Throw them straight in the trash can so you do not dare use one accidentally.

Step Two: Open one plastic Easter egg noting what color it is. Carefully choose two to three pieces of candy of differing colors to place in the egg. The candy colors must not be the same as the egg or any other piece of candy placed in said egg. (Sorry for the fuzzy picture...stupid camera phone.)

Step Three: It is often helpful to lay out each egg/candy combination in order to make sure you do not duplicate that particular combination with another egg. Sometimes I skip Step Three when I'm feeling rebellious. Shhh...don't tell.

Step Four: Apply stickers to the completed eggs so they do not come open in the bag on the way to the fun school Easter celebration. It is imperative that the stickers are of a different color than the egg, and of course, no two stickers may be the same color. (See Step Two) If the stickers are of varying size, please choose one of each to place on the egg. Place them in a pretty bowl to admire for a bit, making sure the eggs are not side-by-side with their same color mate. Yes, I'm aware the yellows are a little too close...thanks for reminding me.

And voila~12 plastic eggs, filled and ready to hunt! You thought I was gonna make it hard on you huh?

I do have to share that the stickers I bought do not stay stuck very well. I guess I could go buy a different kind but I'm a little too tired after slaving over the eggs. And let's be honest, one must learn to pick one's candy-filled Easter egg battles...don't you think?

(*This post is dedicated to all my obsessive-compulsive, anal-retentive, watch-out-or-I'm-gonna-implode friends...and you know who you are...because you are crying at this very moment. And if any of you know how to make all these paragraphs and pictures parallel, for heaven's sake fill me in!)

Monday, March 23, 2009

Yes, I Know He's Completely Fictional

Maybe I should feel guilty, considering my last post was about a ten year anniversary trip with my husband. But I would not be completely honest if I didn't admit that I look forward to a weekly Thursday night date with this guy:

Jim Halpert from The Office.

Yes, I know he's completely fictional.
But here are some of the reasons I love Jim:

*He's funny and his office pranks on Dwight always crack me up
*He's friendly and "every guy" if you will
*He's expressive and cute
*He's a little dorky, but somehow still pretty cool
*He's romantic and affectionate
*He's not afraid to take big chances for love...awwww!

I'm gonna categorize this post under "Confessions" along with a couple others I've done (boobies, anyone?!) and remind myself it's just a way to show you a different side of me. We've all had our crushes on characters in our lifetime, right?? Right?? Please tell me I'm right. Haha! So now's your turn to make a little confession of your own...who's your favorite fictional character crush, past or present, and why?

Friday, March 13, 2009

Romantic Retreat

So the hubby and I are celebrating 10 years this summer and we are trying to decide where we might go to enjoy a little romantic retreat. After all, 10 years and 3 kids later, we're hanging on to those pure "couplehood" days by a single frayed thread. Not really, but sometimes it feels like it, huh? Anyway...

I'm thinking Savannah...

We've only been there once and for just one half of a day really. It was the middle of July and burning up hot. And I do not handle hot very well. Even if I am from Mississippi. I learned at a young age that when it's hot outside, you stay inside. Simple as that. What are air conditioners for anyway? So I'd like to go back and see a little more of the city, check out the local art and maybe dine at Paula Deen's restaurant. I do love me some Southern cookin'!

I'd also love to finally visit Charleston...
I have heard so many wonderful things about this city and I'm sure it would be perfect for a little lovey dovey vacation too. I've heard they have some beautiful semi-private beaches there...wink wink!
So what do y'all think? Have you been to either of these places and which would you recommend? Or do you have another suggestion that is within reason? I mean, obviously, with the stimulus checks not being forthcoming and all, we must set some limits I suppose. Fiji can wait, right?
I'd love to hear your thoughts...

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Oughtta Get Paid For This

Y'all I've been on a health kick and it seems to be working. I think now that I'm of an *ahem* certain age it is finally sinking in that if I want to be healthy and strong, then well, it's up to me to get myself that way. I've tried the whole sittin' on the couch eating like I'm still in college or something and you know what? It's just not cuttin' it anymore. For despite all the excuses I've come up with through the years, what's really been getting in my way is little ole me (or, "not-so-little-anymore ole me"). So about a month ago I joined Weight Watchers online and as of yesterday I met my initial goal weight! Everybody stand up and sing: Go shorty, it's your birthday, and we gon' party like it's your birthday! WooooHoooo! Haha!

Thank you, thank you, alright, yes, you can sit back down now, but...gather around y'all because in my quest to be 'more' of me by being 'less' of me, I have found something I must share with the world, or at the least maybe those two of you who actually read this blog. But I digress. Okay, are you ready for it?....

THIS is the new Object of My Affection and I've just gotta shout it out loud! After years of searching for the perfect water bottle (one simply must have a new-fangled water bottle every time one embarks on a health kick, you know) I finally found THE ONE. And it looks just like this...I'm a little misty-eyed just seeing the picture. This is the Camelbak .75L Better Bottle and I just can't say enough about it--I love, love, love it!! Please allow me to describe to you all the benefits of this OoMA (Object of My Affection):

  • Comes in a variety of colors to suit your taste
  • Has a nifty little handle that makes it easy to carry along even when your hands are full
  • Valve and straw make drinking from it less awkward than turning a water bottle up and chugging right in front of everyone
  • Ingenious colored bite valve camouflages lipstick/gloss residue (gross!)
  • Doesn't sweat a bit even when filled with the iciest of water!

And last, but certainly not least,

  • This water bottle DOES NOT LEAK no matter how much you shake it or which way you turn it or even if you drop it!

I could go on and on, but let me just say I give this water bottle almost all the credit for my newly formed healthy habit of drinking 48+ ounces of water per day. (plus Crystal Light--specifically White Grape--yum!) And when my sweet little two year old daughter looks up at me and asks, "Mommeeeee, Izzat Yew Sippeee Cuuup?" I can say emphatically, "YES! Yes this is mommy's sippy cup! Hallelujah!" I have never had so much love for a water bottle in my life. Whew. Now go out and get ya one!

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Cruel I Tell Ya!

I promise I won't complain again for awhile, but since my blog is only a week old surely you don't expect me to wait until next year to say:

Why does THIS.....

always have to arrive in our mailbox
the week of Valentine's Day!?

It's cruel I tell ya!

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

This One's For The Girls

To tell you the truth, this post is not so much "for" the girls but "about" the girls. And I assure you Martina McBride did not have these particular girls in mind when she recorded her song and stole my post title. No, as far as I know, no song has ever been written about these girls and if it had then surely to goodness I'd know about it by now. The girls I'm referring to are not actually females but they belong to females if you were blessed with those good sorts of genes. So if you're the type who's uncomfortable talking about the female anatomy, then read no further. You have been duly warned.

BOOBIES! There you have it. This post is all about the boobies. And y'all, I'm not afraid to be honest with you about some serious boobie stuff I'm dealing with. I wrote a little song about it (to the tune of "These Boots Were Made for Walking")...and it goes a little somethin' like this:

These boobs weren't made for fallin'
But that's just what they do!
One of these days these boobs are gonna fall down to my shoes!

Just a cutesy song to let everybody in the big blogworld know that women everywhere are being deceived. Not necessarily lied to, just not given the all-out truth before the damage is done. I'm sure the La Leche League and all those others who tout the benefits of breastfeeding have only the best of intentions. But y'all, breastfeeding takes a TOLL, let me tell ya. And I should know. After nursing one baby for 10 months and two babies for 11 months, the ta-tas will never be the same. NE-VER. I can only imagine what that Dugger woman's boobs look like after nursing 18 kids. (I'm guessing she nursed since they're so frugal and all. Can you imagine the cost of formula for 18 kids!?!?!) Anyway, I'm pretty sure she's rolling those lovelies up and into her heavy duty bra at this point in the game.

Which brings me to my real reason for this revealing post: I need your help. Apparently there's nothing I can do about the droop aside from surgery and y'all, I am not all about that...yet. So I'm on the hunt for a bra that'll be a best friend to my boobies--you know, pick them up when they're down, support them through the highs and mostly lows, and just help them present their best selves to the world.

Do your boobies have a best friend like this? If so, please let me know and pronto. 'Cause the shoes--they are not so far away anymore.
Just keepin' it real girls.
Just keepin' it real.